WUNRN
Women's Feature Service
By
Suvendrini Kakuch
Emlyn belongs to a
growing group of women in
According to the 2003
national survey of single mothers and other households conducted by the
Ministry of Health, Labour and Welfare, there were 1.2 million single mothers
in the country. This constitutes an increase of 28 per cent since the last
survey conducted in 1998 – the number of households headed by single mothers
then was 954,000. Among these, 79.9 per cent were divorcees, 12.0 per cent
widows and 5.8 per cent were never-married mothers.
But while the number
of single moms has been on the rise, bringing up a child alone has its
challenges, brought on largely due to difficulties in finding appropriate
employment. That’s because barriers for single mothers in the Japanese job
market are many. According to Terue Shinkaawa, a social commentator and
divorced mother of two, single mothers are doomed to a life of financial
hardship as
Money is definitely
hard to come by for these single crusaders. Sample this: The 2002 figures, as
per the Single Mothers Forum, a support group, reveal that about 60 per cent of
single mothers earn less than three million yen annually - about $25,000. And
41 per cent earn even less - salaries below two million yen or $15,000
annually, a figure that is well below the average income of male salaried
workers. Most of them are forced to work part-time in order to raise their
children and are dependent on state allowances. "Tears fill my eyes when I
think of my child waiting alone in our apartment till I manage to rush home
after being forced to work late," writes a single mother on a website run
by the Single Mothers Forum.
But despite the tears
and tough times, even women in good relationships are choosing not to marry, or
deciding not to officially register their marriages. "There are more women
out there who want to be able to lead their own lives without depending on
husbands or lovers," says Mizuho Fukushima, a popular lawmaker, who also
had a daughter without registering her marriage in order to keep her maiden
name.
In
Comments posted on
the Single Mothers Forum website illustrate a deep aversion among young women
towards tying the knot. “The current system of marriage,” writes a 36-year-old
divorcee, “discriminates against love and children because it forces men and
women to look for a companion who will be a parent first and a spouse second.”
Indeed, Emlyn recalls how her mother and father wept when she told them the
news that she was going to have a child. "They kept saying children must
have fathers and that my life would be a nightmare without a man's financial
support. They told me repeatedly that I was stupidly imitating western
women," she says.
Midori, another single mother of a 10-year-old son, says she refused to accept her boyfriend's marriage proposal a year after their child was born because she felt she would lose her freedom. "While his proposal was tempting as I would not have to work so hard, I said no, because I didn't want to become a wife," she says, “Marriage is too stifling."
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By arrangement with Women’s eNews/WFS