WUNRN
Website & Blog: http://www.nurturingart.com/blog/?cat=3
By Rita Loyd, Spirit Nurturing
Artist & Writer
Self-love
is about the RELATIONSHIP that we have with ourself. And since any
relationship is based upon how we speak to one another, treat one another and
envision one another ~ self-love must be based upon… speaking to ourselves,
treating ourselves and envisioning ourself with love
Self Love Is About the Relationship We Have with Ourself
By Rita Loyd, on February 21st, 2011
"Moment
of peace" by Rita Loyd © 2011
(I have decided to first write
about how to create a safe
space of observation before writing about the gradual process of self-love
because creating a safe space of observation makes is easier to work on the
gradual process of self-love.)
In order to be able to love
ourselves unconditionally, we must first be able to know and understand
ourselves. In order for us to know and understand ourselves, we must be able to
look inward, ask question and be very honest. But it’s not always easy to be
honest with ourselves. So to make the process more comfortable, it is important
to first create a safe space of observation before looking inward.
This safe space of observation
is created by promising ourselves that we will look inward with ONLY
kindness and compassion for those moments. We are not allowed to be critical,
judgmental or condemning. We are to look at the facts of our life as a neutral
observer. The reason for this is because if we looked inward with a critical
eye we would feel judged and then as we felt judged, we would become
self-defensive. And then the self-defensiveness would shut us down and not
allow us to see our truth. But kindness and compassion allows us to be open and
honest…as honest as we are ready and capable of being at that time.
For example: If you want to ask
yourself the question “what is beneath this anger I feel?” You would first
create a safe space of observation by promising yourself that when you think
about this question for the next few minutes, you will have the attitude of
only kindness and gentleness and not of critical judgment. Your focus will be on
gathering the facts and seeing the truth rather than seeing yourself as a bad
or weak person.