WUNRN
Women's Feature Service
"According to projections,
Manjushree
Basu, 63 lives with her 67-year-old husband,
Pralay, who suffers from chronic arthritis. Their only son lives
abroad and visits just once a year. The couple needs help
as
to go to the doctor, and to pick up food supplies.
(Credit: Jayanta Pal\WFS)
By Ajitha
Menon
Kolkata (Women's Feature Service) -
Shipra Mukherjee was the perfect homemaker. She loved playing host to her
family of four sons, daughters-in-law and two grandchildren. But she is 72 now
and finds the task extremely daunting. "My sons stay away from home with
their families but they all descend here during vacations, taking it for
granted that I will tend to them as always. It's as though they have no
realisation how age has taken its toll. None of my daughters-in-law lift a hand
to help me around the house," she says.
Shipra tolerates the exhaustion
because the visits by her children alleviate the loneliness that marks her life
and that of her 76-year-old husband, Subhankar, for the rest of the year.
Subhankar has hypertension and diabetes and Shipra is his sole caregiver.
Subhankar's pension is sufficient
for the couple's day-to-day expenses but they cannot afford full-time domestic
help or a medical care-giver. "My children turn a blind eye to our old age
handicaps. Their attitude is that we have our own home, a pension, so what else
is required. The increasing cost of living, rising medical expenses, the
shrinking rate of interest for bank deposits where we have parked our
retirement funds, the tough job of home maintenance, and so on, do not seem to
concern them at all," rues Shipra.
For an alarming number of India's 91
million population who are 60 Plus, neglect, loneliness, mental and physical
abuse, depression and lack of proper medical care, are turning the dusk of
their life into a living nightmare. As women generally have longer life spans
than men, they account for slightly more than half of the older population and
represent nearly two-thirds of the population who are over 85.
There has been a steep rise in
suicides by the elderly in
In such a scenario, helplines for
the elderly - Pronam: 033-24190740/Dignity Foundation: 033-30690999 - have
emerged as a lifeline. Often they are the only support senior citizens have in
teeming metropolises like Kolkata (formerly Calcutta). "They provide
comfort and give us the chance to mingle with those of our own age. The
helplines also conduct financial and psychological counselling, guide us to
lead a secure and safe existence and provides with us with access to medical
care," says Subha Haldar, 66, a widow living alone in
Over six per cent of
The Dignity Foundation, which runs a
helpline for the elderly in cities like Mumbai, Pune,
For Parvin Sherif, an elderly woman
living in South Kolkata, the routine 'chai adda' sessions at Dignity are an
opportunity to share a cup of tea and snacks with others of her age, sing
songs, exchange gossip, play games and share problems. "The whole
experience is cathartic and prevents us from slipping into depression caused by
loneliness," says Sherif. The Dignity Foundation currently holds 'adda'
sessions for senior citizens at three centres in Kolkata but hopes to gradually
extend the venture to every locality in the city.
Debolina Shah, who is also over 60,
points out that the elderly often withdraw into a shell and suffer in silence
when faced with neglect at home. "The women suffer more as in most cases
they are financially dependent on their partners or children. They are
sometimes physically and mentally abused and made to work as servants despite
their advancing age," she says.
Under these circumstances, the best
thing to do is to smile and join a support group through helplines. "By
becoming part of a group outside the home, the elderly find a healthy and safe
outlet for their need to socialise and express themselves," say Ranjana
Roy, 60, who has just signed up as a new member at one of Dignity Foundation's
Kolkata centres.
The physical and emotional abuse of
the elderly has been of growing concern for the NGOs working in this sector.
Pronam, a group providing security and safety to the senior citizens in
collaboration with Kolkata Police, has 1,453 registered members, among whom 681
stay alone. Pronam gives its members access to medical care and has ties with
31 hospitals. The NGO also has contacts with 48 police stations to reach
immediate security to those who call in for such security. Often it is
protection from their own relatives, according to Shukla Tarafdar,
Administrator, Pronam.
Property disputes and financial
concerns are the main causes for elder abuse, with younger members of the
family perceiving them as burdens. The helplines promise senior citizens
seeking help absolute confidentiality and carry out social interventions to
solve their problem, according to Ghosh. A survey conducted by Silver Innings
Foundation and Society for Serving Seniors - Silver Innings Foundation is a
Mumbai-based initiative for the elderly - in March this year lists fast track
courts, old age pension, a separate medicare policy, and a national level
helpline as the top requirements for the elderly.
Lack of company is another great
problem. "Besides intervention by NGOs, a community-level commitment to
help the elderly couple or the single old man or woman living in the locality
is necessary, to make them feel part of society and cared for," observes
Manjushree Basu, 63. Manjushree lives with her 67-year-old husband, Pralay, who
suffers from chronic arthritis. Their only son lives abroad and visits just
once a year. The couple could really do with some help to go to the doctor, visit
a library or do some shopping.
"It's often thought that money
can solve problems. But for the elderly, money is just one of the problems.
Even if there is money, without help and support we cannot live. Old age is
like another childhood, where a caregiver is a must," says Pralay.
According to projections,
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