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This booklet in an easy to read
Question & Answer form provides answers on everyday questions
and situations on issues relating to polygamy.
"I did not
even know that he had married another woman. He just came home one
day and said, he had married another as though he was telling me he
had got his bonus. Do I not matter? What about this baby I am
breastfeeding, does she not matter?"
-interview with
28-year-old woman, mother of two children.
"Whenever
we have a disagreement, he often says to me, "Remember your place, I
can always marry another, and then you'll know [the consequences].
You can agree or you can be without a husband - the choice is
yours". What kind of a choice is this?"
-interview with
35-year-old woman
"When I
tell him that I don't believe Islam allows men to ill-treat women in
this way (polygamy), he says that I am challenging the word of
Allah, that I will become a murtad if I question this law. So, even
though in my heart I feel this is wrong, I don't say it anymore - he
might just divorce me on the grounds that I am a non-believer! Who
will support me and my kids then?"
-interview with
40-year-old woman, mother of four, two still school-going.
"I do not
understand, Your Honour. If he considers himself someone who has
pity, then why does he not pity our kids?"
- 39-year old
mother of five whose husband applied for permission for a polygamous
marriage in the Wilayah Persekutuan Court, in January 2001 edition
of Mingguan Wanita
"If you fear that
you shall not be able to deal justly with the orphans,marry
women of your choice, two, or three or four; But if you fear
that ye shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then
only one ..... That will be more suitable,to prevent you from
doing injustice."
Surah Al-Nisa' 4:3 (translation
by Abdullah Yusuf Ali)
"You are never able to be fair and just
as between women,
Even if it is your ardent
desire...".
Surah An Nisa 129
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Many forget the authentic hadith (as
reported in Sunan Ibn Majah) which reported that the Prophet
(s.a.w.), when asked if he would permit Saidina Ali to marry
another woman, said that he would not, "....unless and until
Ali Ibn Abi Talib divorces my daughter, for surely she is part
of me and what troubles and agitates her, troubles and
agitates me too; and what harm befalls her befalls me
too."
In other Muslim countries such as
Syria, Jordan, Morocco, Egypt and Iran, they have adopted the
ruling that a husband who has agreed in his marriage contract
not to take another wife during the marriage, is bound by that
stipulation. The awareness about being able to do this is high
in those countries and many couples do insert this stipulation
into the marriage contract. |
Introduction to The Booklet
In
Malaysia, ever since the Law Reform (Marriage and Divorce) Act 1976
was enforced in 1982, banning polygamy for non-Muslims, polygamy has
increasingly come to be associated with Islam.
In the late 1970s and early
1980s, certain attempts have been made intending to control the
abuse of polygamy among the Muslims. However, these attempts have
not been very effective in practice, and it is most unfortunate that
any vigorous measures against the abuse of polygamy are often
condemned as being "un-Islamic", due to a general mistaken notion
that polygamy is a sacred male right guaranteed by Islam.
Sisters in Islam (SIS) wish to
point out that Islam neither invented nor encouraged polygamy.
Unlimited polygamy was a pre-existing practice prior to the
revelations of the Qur'an. The Qur'anic revelations relating to
polygamy are clearly restrictive rather than permissive.
Since the nineteenth century,
several leading Islamic scholars including Sheikh Muhammad Abduh,
the Grand Mufti of Egypt until his death in 1905, have pointed out
that polygamy was reluctantly tolerated by Islam due to the
pre-existing conditions at the time of revelation. Similarly,
slavery was also reluctantly tolerated by Islam, with the guiding
principles towards its eventual abolition by enjoining the kind
treatment of slaves as well as making the freeing of slaves a
cardinal virtue.
The guiding principles in the
Qur'an against polygamy can be demonstrated by firstly, limiting the
maximum number of wives to four, then by enjoining on the fair and
just treatment of multiple wives, and finally by declaring that fair
and just treatment is impossible.
An argument that is sometimes
put forward in support of polygamy is that it is intended to reduce
social ills such as illicit affairs, prostitution and the birth of
illegitimate children. However, the legality of polygamy has not
actually put an end to these social ills among the Muslim community.
In some cases, it might even have contributed to the problem of
social ills among young people who have been brought up in unhappy
and neglected polygamous households.
It is disheartening that many
of those who advocate polygamy seem to ignore Qur'anic injunctions
on polygamy in Surah An Nisa 4:3 : "if you fear you cannot deal
justly (with your wives), marry only one (wife)". The Qur'an is also
the only holy scripture that contains the phrase "marry only one". A
further injunction is to be found in Surah An Nisa 4:129 which goes
on to add that "You are never able to be fair and just as between
women, even if it is your ardent desire...".
If the rights of Muslim women
are upheld and advanced as contained in the spirit of the Qur'an,
then the justice that it embodies will never be
ignored.
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